Stupid humans, Ch. 1

So this guy in Russia thinks it would be fun to take his dachshund scuba diving. While we appreciate his wanting to spend more time with his canine, this was a bit too much for us when we heard the poor thing squeaking underwater.
Please.
Here's a video.
We think they probably quit filming after the dog came out of the water and tore the owner a new orafice. And we don't mean a hole in his wetsuit, either. 
Bet that made him squeak.

We saw the Wienermobile!

It's true! The staff took us on a great field trip this weekend!
We saw the official Wienermobile, or at least one of them.

While we weren't allowed to go inside, we did get to stand on the steps and we had our pictures taken with it.  Here are a few of the pics -- the best ones have the staff in them because they were helpful and lifted us up so we could see better. Staffer Dad also let Bandit sniff the back end of the giant hotdog, and Maggie got to look in through the windshield since she was told in no uncertain terms she couldn't drive.

The hotdog was parked in front of a Kroger, and of course we couldn't go in there either. Lots of people were hanging around, and we expected to come out of the deal with at least a munchie or two. But, it was a pretty clean parking lot. The Wienermobile's staff was really, really nice, and one of them even said she was from Staffer Dad's home state, Missouri. If you want to see more about the stop in Savannah, here's a video of the inside and other pics from savannahnow.com.

All good field trips are educational. Here's what we learned:

• There are eight total rolling wieners and six on the road. The other two are for back-up. You can learn more about the fleet here.
• The big wiener sits on a Chevy truck chasis. We wondered about that since it seemed roomy and nice.
• There is no chili or mustard or relish on it. Just a dog and a bun. The seats are mustard-colored, though.
• The way-cool celebrity meat vehicles winter in Wisconsin and head all over in the summer driven by students who call themselves "hotdoggers." They keep a blog, too.
• Wiener dogs who eat hot dogs are not cannibals. Hot dogs aren't made from wiener dogs. We were very glad to have that fact reinforced. The Kitten told us they were. But, thankfully, we learned that's not true. Wonder why he told us that?

Field trips are fun!

All right. We know.

We've been scarce lately. And we're sorry. It's been a little nuts since the stupid Kitten came to live with us. Bandit has lost a lot of his eyesight, and Maggie, well, she's still cranky as ever.
In other words, we're fine.

Summer's here and the staff is finally spending some time around the house. It's a holiday weekend, and we generally expect our annual road trip and some Wimbledon action. This week, they've got us all discombobulated. But we did get to go riding, so that's a start.

Who's up for some wiener-dog curling?

OK. It always seems like we're apologizing for taking a break, but it's been really darn cold, it snowed and we discovered a new sport to keep us mesmerized for the past two weeks.
We organized our naps and play around the basketball season until the Tar Heels imploded. It's not that we are fair-weather fans. We absolutely aren't -- but it became pretty painful to watch and we can only take so much.
We took our solace in the Winter Olympics and curling. Now that's a really great game, and we think it could be more popular if they'd listen to a few of our suggestions.
We're certain if you added a dachshund to each team, the swifter, more unpredictable movement would guarantee more sponsors and some serious cash and snackies for the players.
Let's face it: What's more entertaining than wiener dogs on ice? What if they were dodging 42-pound pieces of granite? Substitute dachshunds for at least one sweeper per team, and as they say, it would be a total game-changer!

P.S. We think more teams should look as sharp as the Norwegians.....those pants are the best!

A new perch!

We didn't think the staff would let us go without a place to nap, but we were unprepared for the way-cool pillow they brought us. It has a warm side and a cool one. It's fat and feels firm on our backs. It's Great!
We slept for 3 straight hours on it just to make sure it was the right one. We still miss Green Pillow's homey smell, but we'll get this one just right over time. Oh yeah.

R.I.P. Green Pillow

So this is how it ends.
We run into the room, and it's gone. Our dear Green Pillow.

It's true. It had lost its padding, cushioning for our backs. But it was still our safe place to run when we were in trouble. The staff always promised we'd never suffer consequences of our mischief if we ran to Green Pillow and stayed for a bit. We used it well.
The round mound has been our spot to view the world: We've welcomed new kittens, old friends and good parties. From there, we've cheered the Heels to championships, the Cardinals to the World Series and watched Serena take on Venus and line judges.
It's a warm place where we've snoozed for many, many hours on cold, rainy days.
And best of all, nothing in this world smelled like our friend, Green Pillow. And that is probably why it is now gone.

Rest in peace, Green Pillow.

Cold weather blues

We're not sure why it's cold outside, but we can attest that is and has been very cold. It's so cold the staff won't even make us stay out for our normal time in the evenings before bedtime. Staffer Mom says no beast should be out in this weather, and we're OK with that. We did suggest she let the Willis and his deer friends in the house, and she refused to consider it.
Maggie got a science lesson, too. Bandit remembers living in Kentucky where it stayed cold a lot. He said that pee will crack when it hit the cold stone outside the door, and it will! We've tried it several times now and so Staffer Mom says we have to go all the way off the walk before we can pee now. That's probably for the best anyway since the grass doesn't seem so cold.
It needs to get warm soon. We can only amuse ourselves in this cold for so long.

Home again, and the truth about Kitten

Whew.
It's been a wild week or so, and we're happy to be home with Green Pillow and our fave food bowls. It was a nice time, though. We met a new puppy friend, Gilmour. Our staff spent a bit more time than we thought was appropriate, but he did seem sweet enough.

When we got home, we found Kitten had just taken over.
He's a pain in our hides, and we're really very tired of his getting to be anywhere he wants and going places we're never allowed. We're posting a couple examples to prove the situation.

1- The Christmas tree. Yes, it was supposed to stand upright, and yes, the staff did decorate it. Staffer Mom was not amused.
2- Kitten in OUR laundry room. Note to selves: Find a way to get Staffer Dad to shut the lid. Even if we're too short to turn on the washer, he can sit in there for a bit and reflect on his behavior.